You may notice a few more entries that showed up on my blog that don’t necessarily pertain specifically to running or exercise. They were from my other blog which was more of a general journal. Anyway, two separate blogs are kind of a pain to manage-at least for me-so i imported all those entries and will occasionally add entries not so running specific to this one. I mean, everything in my life is pretty interconnected, so why not add some of my just general ramblings to this one?
So, here’s my first general rambling. I just totally lost it at my supervisor. I don’t normally just blow, but today I did. Here’s why: Things at my job are so up in the air right now. It’s looking like my company is going to get dissolved and my position will be rolled back into the parent company. Supposedly I will still have a job, but it’s not 100% certain. And even if I do get to keep my job, I probably won’t be doing as much challenging, publishing related work-I really don’t know. So that’s got me down and I’ve been looking for other jobs, but nothing has materialized yet. I’m trying to surrender and just trust that everything will work out, but it’s hard, and the current situation has gotten me down. So I’m a little grumpy at work. Combine that with the constant gossip and speculation that goes on here. Just on Friday, my coworkers were talking about how the owners had to get a second mortgage out on their house to pay our salaries. I don’t know how true that is, but it’s disconcerting-so of course I worried about that all weekend.
Last week I did some shopping and bought a $15 dress. I wore it on Friday and got the 3rd degree from my supervisor about having something new on. In fact, every time I come in she asks if my outfit is new or if i did something to my hair or whatever. I understand that may be her way of making conversation, but when it’s every day it gets annoying, and it makes me uncomfortable to wear anything new to work.
Ok, so those things have got me a little irritated, plus I’m just tired and worn out anyway. So, I’m not exactly a little ray of sunshine wearing a big cheesy smile today. So my supervisor asks me if something’s wrong. And I, very calmly, reply, no, nothing’s wrong. I am fine. To which I get a “no, you’re totally not fine! i know something’s wrong!” (this is in front of my two coworkers-by the way) and at that i just lost it. “I am fine! You are always asking me if something’s wrong and it’s annoying. I am fine!” And she then turns to my coworkers and says, “Ha, I knew it! Something’s is wrong! Come on guys, let’s heckle it out of her!” Which totally pissed me off even more. So I was like, “yes, i’m grumpy. and asking me a million f-ing times if I’m ok and then needling me about it isn’t helping!” So then my coworkers all go back to work, laughing. Except me. I’m fuming.
Is it just me, or am I not allowed to be in a mood at work without being pestered? I know it’s my coworker’s personality to want to make sure everyone is OK, but seriously-she gets a little too involved and needles a little too much, so that finally I just lose it and let loose on her. But, I’m just curious…is this normal for an office environment? I’ve never experienced it before, so i’m a little curious. Do other people experience this at their workplace?
